I will start by saying that I’m sure tiny Jett went to a well-screened, perfectly wonderful forever home, and I’m ultimately glad about that.
I really, really, REALLY hate how this one went down, and we are recommitted now to never ever letting this happen this way again.
As I just wrote that, I just had an epiphany about myself and fostering. It is totally not all about the kittens. Part of what I love and what is important to me isn’t just raising great kittens – it’s about placing them with people who are right for them, and vice versa. It’s about the people, too. That’s why when my dear friend Les wasn’t sure about a kitten, but I just knew “Nostache” was extra special, and needed someone just right, I let her know, and she came to meet him, and now she has the wonderful Eckersley – because I was right.
Anyway, I met Jett’s people at Petsmart while I was visiting yesterday. They adored her, and she picked them. She nursed on their fingers, and lovied them up like she hadn’t done for anyone else. They had visited three times that week, and although she had had an allergic reaction, they were working out ways to make it work because, she picked them, and wormed her tiny black body into their hearts, and sunk her claws in deep. We sat together for 2 hours yesterday. It was awesome. I wanted them to have her SO BAD! They called the rescue coordinator about 4 times while we were together, leaving messages. I left there without knowing if it would work out, but hoping, and they had my info for hopeful future updates.
Today we went to visit Joule, and Jett was gone. That, first of all, is part of why I will never do this this way again. I was told I’d know when they got approved for adoption, and except for when I was AT Petsmart and got to meet the people, that hasn’t happened once. I understand how difficult that may be, logistically, but I’m not just some foster they dropped a few kittens off with – these were MY babies, and I signed them up with them because I hadn’t found them homes. Ah … another epiphany. For them, it’s all about the kittens. It’s not about the people at all, aka me.
Anyway, I asked if it was Paul and Jen who got her, and it wasn’t, and I was seriously bummed. About a half hour into our visit, I saw Jen peeking into the area, and we grinned wildly at each other, and I gave her a big hug. She told me she’d been approved after a really long interview with the coordinator, and she and her fiancee were SO excited! I told her Jett was gone, and neither of us could understand!
I’m not sure really where the screw up was; somehow someone else had gotten approval to take Jett, and the manager let them leave with her, even though the adoption coordinator said that only Paul and Jen were approved for Jett. The man who adopted Jett was called, and apparently he said that had it been an hour or so earlier (he had only had her about 2 hours at that point) that maybe he’d have brought her back, but he’d already introduced her to his other cat, and started the process, and no, he wouldn’t bring her back.
Jen was in tears, and so was I. This was one of the most horrible things ever. And I won’t do it again. I got the most adorable photo of the two of them holding Jett like a baby, while she purred and just loved them. I’m not posting it because I think Jen may come by to the website, and I honestly think it might be too painful for her (well, and I didn’t get permission to post the picture, either.)
My whole afternoon and evening has been colored by this, and I can’t even find much happiness in Jett’s adoption, like I usually would. I’m quite sure the people at the rescue place think I’m just a nutcase about my kittens, and that all that matters is that they got a great home. But that’s rather like telling a woman who had an unwanted, unnecessary c-section that “all that matters is a healthy baby” while totally dismissing the complete violation of her own experience in the process. Of COURSE I want Jett to have a great home, and I’m glad of it, just like a woman wants a healthy baby – but for chrissake – the process and the way you get there DOES matter too!
So, yeah. Not doing this any more. I’m more determined than ever to find other ways to rehome future foster kittens, that don’t require me signing them over to anyone else. Amanda and I have been talking about setting up our own 501c3 corporation for a couple of years – this is the year I’ll make it happen, one way or another. Then we can get the discount vet care, pull from shelters ourselves, and never have to let someone else tell us (or not tell us!) what to do with the tiny lives we’ve cared for.
Joule is still at Petsmart, and if she doesn’t get adopted in the next few days I hope they’ll let her come back as a foster, and if not we’ll formally adopt her. We won’t bring Pampi or Photon to Petsmart. I’m not going through this again. They are technically the rescue’s now, but I’ll pay the adoption fee to regain control of them if needed.
Joule, after not seeing Aidon for a week, was SO happy to see him.
I need to get more recent pics of Pampi. I seem to be lacking in those!
Joule has one of the prettiest faces ever, and the personality to go with it. She is SWEET!
If anyone want one of the sweetest kittens EVER, I still have Pampi and Photon, and like I said, Joule is still available too.
Photon is gorgeous, and he knows it, and has so much personality, I will probably need to do an entire blog post just on him.
No, really two tons of personality. Maybe more.
Also, snuggly!
Joule does know how to be a little bit naughty – she’s right up where she shouldn’t be, playing with a mousey.
Goodbye Jett. You are a wonderful kitten, and I’m glad you got a forever home, with a buddy, it sounds like. I’m sorry you didn’t go to the people I think you picked. Suck some fingers for me, little one.
Wow, Kimberly. it sounds like the adoption process totally broke down and didn’t respect the committments they’d previously made to you. I know that you have a special bond with your babies, and it must be beyond frustrating that Jett went to someone random that never had the privilege of meeting you and hearing Jett’s story. And how heartbreaking for the couple that was prepared to welcome her into their home after Jett chose them.
Let me know if we can help with your non-profit somehow, please?
Wow, that’s really frustrating.
I had a similar experience with the Humane Society I foster for, with the lack of communication, I mean. I was fostering four little ones for only two days before they got so sick (with coccidia) that I thought they needed some professional care, so I gave them back to the HS, thinking I would get them back soon, once they were stable. I called every couple of days after that, asking how they were doing, and I would always get the same stock answer of “oh, they’re doing fine, getting better.” One time I got the answer “oh, we’re just waiting for them to put on a little more weight and then they can be adopted.” I was like, why aren’t they with ME if they’re healthy enough to be adopted? Fortunately I did get them back–they all came down with kitty colds and couldn’t go up for adoption after all, so they went back into fostering.
But when they called me to tell me I could pick the kittens back up, they told me to not be surprised that there were only three left–one of them hadn’t made it. I was so upset! Not only because I had bonded with the little girl and named her already, but because they hadn’t told me any of the SEVERAL times I’d called that she had passed! I kept asking how my kittens were, and they never told me. I understand that they’re a big organization and I probably got a different person every time I called, but still, I cared about that kitten and they acted like it didn’t matter if I was told the truth or not. I don’t even know when she died. If it was right after I gave them back (she was very sick), then they should have told me the FIRST time I called. I was so angry and sad.
Fortunately the remaining three boys came home with me and I gave them a lot of love. They were so uncertain at first–I could tell that being kept in a little cage had kept them from learning how to climb and jump, so I was glad they got to stretch their legs in my home for a few weeks. All three of them ended up having more health problems after that, one of which was particularly worrying–blood in the urine. I kept calling the vet to ask what I should do, and she said I should bring him in to be looked at. When I arrived the vet was in surgery, and the receptionist just said I could leave them there. I wasn’t about to leave them again! I didn’t know if I’d ever get them back if I did that! I insisted on waiting until I could talk to the vet. She also suggested that I leave them there, but I said that I thought the going back and forth to the HS and back was taking a toll on them in terms of stress, and it was better for them to be in a stable, calm environment. So she said “well, I can just give you the medicine we would give him.” Perfect. I took him home and gave him the meds and although he still had pink pee for another week, he never got worse and it cleared up eventually. I was glad I took him home with me. He was a little nervous guy and I really think the stress and uncertainty of being at the HS was worse for his health than just staying with me, even though he supposedly would have gotten better care there.
There were some other minor problems, a tapeworm and a runny eye that wouldn’t clear up, but eventually they were all healthy and happy and went to good homes. But I’ve learned that I can’t trust the Humane Society to understand how much I care about these kittens and how willing I am to give them medical care MYSELF. That’s one of the reasons I started fostering in the first place!
Oh man, I’m sorry for this huge rant. Your experience just touched a nerve in me. I’m sorry about Jett. I hope Jen and Paul find another perfect kitten for them.
Don’t apologize, it’s kind of relieving to hear about other people having difficult situations like that. Not that I would wish that on anyone, just it’s nice to know it’s not just me. Hopefully you know what I mean 😉
Another foster mom said something wise to me recently about how it sometimes takes a long while to find an organization you mesh well with, and that’s probably true.
I’m done looking, though. I’d rather be my own organization. But lessons really well learned for ME if I ever have foster parents working under me! I want to make sure I treat them the way I wish I’d been treated!
I hope Jen and Paul find another perfect kitten, too. That broke all three of our hearts, but especially theirs. You can read their stories on Yelp for Hopalong and feel their pain. Hopalong apparently either sent out a call/email for positive reviews, or did them themselves because all of a sudden there are a whole BUNCH just today in an effort to bury Jen’s and Paul’s. Sheesh. I don’t think they’re evil, I’m sure they do a lot of good for a lot of animals; but they TOTALLY blew it on this transaction, and then totally failed on the aftercare of having made a big mistake, and that’s a real shame. It would have been nice if they’d owned up instead of what the did do.
*sighs* Never again, for me!
I wish I could go to the San Francisco area and adopt one of your kittens. I lost my old cat of 17 years this past November, and as I near my 22nd birthday I’m getting a kitten for a birthday present. I know you take good care of the babies and would love to have a ‘Kimberly Approved’ kitty!!! I’d give them lots of love ad try and send videos and photos to you, and make them happy and fat.
I’m sorry you had to deal with that with Jett and Joule, and I hope Jett found a good home. Good luck on your own organization and future kitten rearing!!!